Everyone loves bacon. Really, what’s not to love? It fulfills all the major food groups- crisp, salt and grease. And, it literally makes everything better. No matter how miserable you might feel in your new luxurious kitchen decked out in nice colourful glass splashbacks or receiveing loads of quotes from CD duplication salesmen or being pestered by equally annoying double glazing quotes salesmen. Don’t believe me? Here’s a bacon recipe for every meal of the day.  Is it any wonder that the United States of America has one of the most obese populations in the world?

Bacon Stout for Breakfast

Yes, you read that correct. What’s better than bacon for breakfast? Bacon in beer, of course. We don’t fancy ourselves alcoholics over here so add a splash of coffee to take the edge off.

Don’t Forget the Chocolate Covered Bacon

What breakfast would be complete without chocolate? And what makes chocolate even better? That’s right ladies and gentlemen, B-A-C-O-N. Check out mariniscandies.com to order your box today!

A Quick Lunch at KFC

For an on-the-go bacon lunch head over to KFC for their new Double Down Sandwich. It’s like a BLT wrapped in fried chicken. WINNING!   I have to tell you; I love bacon, I love chicken and I love cheese (I am after all, from Wisconsin). But when I saw the picture of KFC’s Double Down Sandwich, even I had to go “Whoa!” here it is:

  • Two pieces of bacon
  • Two slices of melted Monterey jack and pepper cheese
  • Glob on some Colonel’s special sauce (the word ‘special’ in these always worries me)
  • And instead of a bun, two Original Recipe chicken breasts (for you health conscious individuals, as if, you can have the chicken breasts grilled)
  • Calories: 540, fat: 32 g; sodium 1380 mg

There you have it. KFC’s answer to, “how can I abuse my body today?” If you’re more the stay at home artery clogger, have I got the recipes for you!

 

A Bacon Lovers Dream Dinner

A Nice Healthy Salad to Start (Total: fat-2096g, calories 28,031)

  • As your Lettuce-Flank steak sliced thin to resemble lettuce leafs (fat: 480g, calories: 7040)
  • As your carrots- Pepperoni sliced lengthwise to resemble carrot sticks (fat: 120g, calories 1600)
  • Taking the place of your radishes will be-Meat balls (190g of fat and a mere 2500 calories)
  • No cucumbers for you-Sausages, again, sliced lengthwise to resemble cucumber sticks (fat: 50g, calories 850)
  • Tomato wedges-Nope. Salami wedges (fat: 180g, calories 2200)
  • Flattened chicken breasts fried up covered with an egg/wine type of batter (fat: 15g, calories: 1200)
  • In place of croutons-Diced ham (fat: 112g, calories 3200)
  • Beer bacon bits-Bacon chunks fried up in beer (fat: 760g, calories 7600)
  • Your “lo-cal” dressing-Creamy beer bacon dressing; take the bacon grease already in the hot pan, add more beer, stir in heavy cream; when slightly cooled put in blender with some fried bacon and blend (fat: 189g, calories 1841)

The Main Course

You know you like it. In fact, you love it. And, you want more of it. It’s every bacon lovers masterpiece of greasy goodness. That’s right, it’s the Bacon Explosion. Not sure how to create your own? Check it out:

  • Kansas City style sauce rubbed Italian sausage, smoked slowly over hickory and oak wood; no doubt to seal in all that… juice.
  • Stuffed with bacon
  • Wrapped in bacon

How popular is it? Let’s just say that after countless orders poured in they actually felt it necessary to expand the product (expand being the key word there) to 2 more versions of their product; you can now purchase a heat and eat Original Bacon Explosion in an additional Jalapeño or Cheese variety. Yes, cheese. Amazingly, they even sell it in its own little carrier/holder. The Bacon Explosion Pig-Porter. Wouldn’t want to add on all those carbs with a big old hot dog bun.

So stay home and ‘pig’ out or roll on out and take the bacon bus tour of your local restaurants. Either way, I’ll be seeing you in the ICU! You can have the bed right next to mine. We’ll order takeout!

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